Female Orgasm Fact:
"Women do not take longer to orgasm than men; The majority of the women in Kinsey’s study masturbated to orgasm within four minutes, similar to the men in this study."
- Shere Hite
The female orgasm is the peak of a woman’s sexual arousal. It is the involuntary rhythmic contracting of the lower pelvic muscles, and sometimes causes spasms in other parts of the body, such as the limbs. The female orgasm doesn’t normally produce any fluid like a man’s, but some women experience what is called “female ejaculation,” a gushing of fluid upon orgasm.
The result of an orgasm is usually a feeling of relaxation, thought to be connected to the release of prolactin into the bloodstream. Oxytocin, another chemical released during arousal and orgasm, is thought to be responsible for pleasant feelings during and after sex, including the sense of feeling emotionally close to your partner. Scientists are trying to figure out if this chemical is responsible for human partnering habits.
A female orgasm is brought into being via sexual stimulation of some kind. A high percentage of women find it difficult to orgasm with penetration alone, and require clitoral stimulation. This specific stimulation can be achieved in many ways; for example, in the missionary position, the man’s pubic bone and hair may stimulate the clitoris enough to bring about an orgasm.
Every woman is unique in what brings her to orgasm.
Female Orgasm
Some women find it very difficult to orgasm. This can be due to a variety of reasons, however, the main one is that the touch just hasn’t been in the right place, whether it's from penetrative sex, or from hands, the mouth or some other object. The female orgasm, much ignored in the past as women were not recognized as sexual beings, has been brought into the light and more attention is now focused on the sexual pleasure of women.
The female orgasm has been made out to be the be-all-and-end-all of a sexual encounter. This pressure has encouraged men and women to get more creative in their sexual escapades, helping to ensure more orgasms. But because this doesn't always work out the way it was intended, many women are still living their lives orgasmless, and their partners feel inadequate. Women are encouraged to masturbate on their own to learn what sort of touch brings them to orgasm most easily, then share this with their partners.
Female Orgasm Fact
Of 82% of women who said they masturbated in a survey conducted by Hite Research International, 95% could orgasm easily and regularly, whenever they wanted. source askmen.com
Thursday
Female Orgasm Myths
Female Orgasm Myths: We’ve come a long way since the days when science doubted the existence of the female orgasm. Today, a woman’s sexual satisfaction is a major field of study and the average couple has spent a great deal of time trying to improve her experience. This is certainly appreciated, but some of you may be trying too hard; her level of satisfaction may already be everything she could hope for. That’s right: You may be striving toward a goal that has been based entirely on myth. This misinformation circulates with surprising frequency and you may be shocked (if not relieved) to learn how wrong some of them are. Read on as we discuss, and set right, the biggest female orgasm myths around.
All women want a G-spot orgasm
Put in the simplest terms possible: This is a load of crap. While it’s true that many women lust for G-spot orgasms, it’s a complete orgasm myth that all women desire such a thing. For many women, having the G-spot stimulated -- even "correctly" -- results in a sensation that can only be described as extremely uncomfortable. It can make a woman feel like she needs to urinate immediately, and that’s never fun. It can also cause her to feel pain, and not in a sexy S&M kind of way, either. In fact, the whole stimulating the G-spot thing can annoy some women to the point where it completely turns them off for the rest of the evening. Yes, some women love having their G-spot stimulated -- but many don’t.
Women need a skilled partner to orgasm
Many men pride themselves on their ability to make a woman orgasm (and your skills are definitely appreciated), but the ultimate responsibility for a woman’s orgasm belongs to her. It’s perfectly normal for a woman to have difficulty achieving a vaginal orgasm -- that’s why God invented the clitoris. Meaning: She can still achieve a fabulous orgasm even if her lover is a virgin with limited experience and know-how. A man’s efforts are certainly helpful, but if she’s not achieving orgasm she has no one to blame but herself. Additionally, many women suffer from performance anxiety just as men do. If a woman falls into this category, even the most skillful of men wouldn’t be able to make her orgasm, regardless of his efforts.
Women need to orgasm to enjoy themselves
This orgasm myth couldn’t be further from the truth. Sex feels good whether you have an orgasm or not, and when combined with the right level of intimacy, the experience can be immensely satisfying regardless of whether or not she climaxes. Many women even prefer foreplay to actual sex and orgasm. Why? Because, for some women kissing, hugging and caressing are more satisfying than anything you see in porn flicks. If you combine these acts of affection with slow and steady penetration, most women will be perfectly content at the end of your love session.
Vaginal orgasms are better than clitoral orgasms
This orgasm myth is a bit like comparing apples and oranges. OK, not exactly, but you get the idea. The basic point is this: Both are perfectly lovely and they can be equally satisfying. The only reason vaginal orgasms are regarded as the Holy Grail of ecstasy is how infrequently they occur. Statistically speaking, it’s estimated that 30% of women will never even experience one and only 30% do so with regularity. That means you have a very good chance of dating or marrying a woman who will never achieve a vaginal orgasm. Unfair as that may sound, clitoral orgasms are not to be taken lightly; they can be absolutely earth-shattering under the right circumstances, and some women prefer them. Clitoral orgasms are wonderful and there is no reason to pity a woman who hasn’t experienced an orgasm through vaginal stimulation.
Women can’t ejaculate
Anyone who still believes this orgasm myth has clearly never seen a good porn film. Women can definitely ejaculate, and some can do so more forcefully (and with more volume) than men. It’s a relatively new acknowledgment in the scientific community, so the research still leaves something to be desired, but there’s plenty of evidence to support the claim. We know that women ejaculate through the urethra, just like men. Female ejaculate contains the same substances male ejaculate contains, and it’s produced in the "female prostate" -- an organ which is extremely similar to the male prostate, albeit smaller. Women seem to ejaculate primarily through direct stimulation of the G-spot (some scientists believe this is actually the urethral sponge), but not all women can or will experience ejaculation. So, if she doesn't have a gushing end, don't think she didn't enjoy herself, just try again another time.
Orgasmic Mythology
So there you have it: Five female orgasm myths totally debunked. While it’s admirable to concern yourself with your woman’s pleasure and level of satisfaction, you’re not solely responsible for her orgasm. If she doesn’t have one, she could still be having the time of her life. If, however, you really have your heart set on making her holler, we recommend asking her to masturbate for you, which will provide plenty of insight (and quite a show) into how she prefers to reach orgasm. source: askmen.com
Friday
10 Steps to Female Orgasm
Female Orgasm - what to do if you want to bring your partner to orgasm regularly:
Step 1 to Female Orgasm:
- don't be in a rush.
Step 2 to Female Orgasm:
- don't be too demanding – it's not an Olympic event.
Step 3 to Female Orgasm:
- talk to your partner, and ask her what she wants you to do to her.
Step 4 to Female Orgasm:
- always create a romantic atmosphere.
Step 5 to Female Orgasm:
- make sure that everything is comfortable and nice for her.
Step 6 to Female Orgasm:
- give her lots of kisses and cuddles before you even think about making any approach to her sexual area.
Step 7 to Female Orgasm:
- when you do start to stroke, rub or kiss her genitals, don't rush into 'attacking' her clitoris. Take things gently, and see what she wants.
Step 8 to Female Orgasm:
- use her own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris. (it may be a good idea to use some additional lubrication from a chemist or a sex shop).
Step 9 to Female Orgasm:
- remember that stimulation of the clitoris is the key to female orgasm.
Step 10 to Female Orgasm:
- sometimes encourage her to 'run' your sex sessions. You can learn a lot by watching how she stimulates herself or by really listening to her when she suggests a sex position, or a particular caress.
Step 1 to Female Orgasm:
- don't be in a rush.
Step 2 to Female Orgasm:
- don't be too demanding – it's not an Olympic event.
Step 3 to Female Orgasm:
- talk to your partner, and ask her what she wants you to do to her.
Step 4 to Female Orgasm:
- always create a romantic atmosphere.
Step 5 to Female Orgasm:
- make sure that everything is comfortable and nice for her.
Step 6 to Female Orgasm:
- give her lots of kisses and cuddles before you even think about making any approach to her sexual area.
Step 7 to Female Orgasm:
- when you do start to stroke, rub or kiss her genitals, don't rush into 'attacking' her clitoris. Take things gently, and see what she wants.
Step 8 to Female Orgasm:
- use her own natural lubrication to moisten her clitoris. (it may be a good idea to use some additional lubrication from a chemist or a sex shop).
Step 9 to Female Orgasm:
- remember that stimulation of the clitoris is the key to female orgasm.
Step 10 to Female Orgasm:
- sometimes encourage her to 'run' your sex sessions. You can learn a lot by watching how she stimulates herself or by really listening to her when she suggests a sex position, or a particular caress.
The Way to Female Orgasm
These days most women want orgasms. That wasn't always the case. A couple of generations or so ago, many adult females simply didn't have climaxes – and a lot of them weren't bothered about it. Probably a lot of them didn't actually know what an orgasm was.
And some doctors claimed that, for a huge proportion of women, it was 'normal' to have no experience of orgasm. Indeed, as late as the 1970s there were still some who maintained that the female orgasm didn't exist – and was simply a myth made up by the media.
All that has changed now. These days, medical opinion is that every woman should be able to have orgasms – if she wants to. Furthermore, the view of most sex experts is that the majority of women are capable of multiple orgasms – if they wish to have them. In general, the ability to have multiple orgasms is greater in more mature women.
What is a female orgasm?
We're writing this explanation in the assumption that you – the reader – are male. But what follows will be of interest to a lot of female readers too.
What happens in a woman's body during a climax is very like what happens in your (male) body when you ejaculate. In other words, there's a feeling of increasing excitement, building up to a point where everything 'blows' in a great blast of ecstasy. This 'orgasmic moment' is characterised by surges of contractions in the sex organs, occurring almost every 0.8 seconds.
Men are well aware that these throbs of pleasure are accompanied by the pumping out of spurts of seminal fluid. Obviously this doesn't happen in women.
A few females do produce some fluid at orgasm, but the impression given in so many erotic stories that most women 'ejaculate' is not correct. Only a minority of females do this.
Female Orgasm - Multiple orgasm
The other big difference between male and female orgasm is this: after the first climax, many women can 'come' again, often within a minute or two.
This ability is extremely rare in males. Relatively few young women can achieve multiple orgasm, because it's an ability that usually has to be learned. But with the help of a skilled lover, most women can eventually achieve the capacity for multiple orgasms – if they so desire.
Female Orgasm - Bringing women to a climax
For men perhaps the most important thing to realise about female climaxes is that with women, it's not a mechanical thing – as it generally is with men.
You see, most males will ejaculate quite quickly if they have their penises rubbed. This applies even if the circumstances aren't very romantic – or even if they don't particularly like the person who's doing the rubbing! Women are not like this. Female orgasm isn't a push-button response. The conditions have to be right.
Although females vary, many women need the following if they're going to reach a climax easily:
- a romantic atmosphere
- pleasant, comfortable surroundings
- a partner who they really like
- a feeling of being wanted and appreciated
- a good flow of natural lubrication - so that the delicate female parts don't get sore
- a skilled partner who knows how to stimulate the clitoris.
Unless you can provide the above, you are not going to have great success in giving your partner orgasms.
Please bear in mind that – contrary to what many men think – sexual intercourse by itself is not likely to produce an orgasm. This is because intercourse alone is not very good at stimulating the woman's clitoris. Nearly all females need additional stimulation of the clitoris by fingers or mouth.
So, try not to give the impression to your female partner that she ‘ought’ to be able to climax through intercourse alone and that that is what you think of as ‘proper sex’. The sex menu can be a varied one. Some women, for example, find it really easy to climax through oral sex – particularly if the guy is patient and sensitive to what his partner wants. And how does he find out what she wants and what turns her on? Well, a wise man will ask her.
What he should not do is to assume that his technique is flawless and that if his partner does not come, it’s her fault. Plenty of men think that because a previous girlfriend always came a certain way, this one should follow suit. Women are not all the same in their likes or dislikes. So do try to treat your partner as an individual.
Many women like much more foreplay or loveplay than men imagine. They want to feel that the man is keen on giving pleasure – and not just in a hurry to have his own climax. In fact, the worst thing a man can say to a woman is: ‘Haven’t you come yet?’ This is likely to make her feel extremely inadequate and will ruin any build-up of sexual pleasure and tension that might have been taking place. source askmen.com
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